Owning Your Cycle: The Emotions That Guide You
When you think about your menstrual cycle, it shouldn’t be defined by feelings of stress and uncertainty or seen as a painful end to weeks of unregulated, unruly emotion.
Menstruators should feel able to hold periods and menstrual cycles alongside their emotions as one continuous flow of internal wellbeing and bodily transformation, using insights from their own experience to make these transformations work for them. It’s a common experience among those who menstruate to have had their emotions explained to them as simply the result of hormonal changes, outwith their own control, and irrational. The ‘Is it that time of the month again?’ response, seen in many a sitcom, has created a lasting impression: menstruators must accept that they and those around them are entirely at the whim of whatever hormonal phase they may be in and the emotions that it may evoke.
This misleading rhetoric discourages people from recognising how their emotions may, in fact, change and evolve in conjunction with their menstrual cycle. It also has a knock-on effect: hindering proper understanding of how, when, and why our cycles can impact our emotional and physical climates. Understanding what to expect from our menstrual cycle and talking about these experiences with friends could help menstruators honour and own our changing emotional landscapes. Of course, not all emotional experiences can be attributed to the menstrual cycle. Even experts disagree on how much impact hormones have on emotion but noticing even some emotional patterns in your and the cycles of those around you can offer insight to help empower menstruators and incite conversations.
It’s important to note that the menstrual cycle isn’t just about the period — it’s a full 21–35-day rhythm divided into four phases, with each bringing different strengths, challenges, and needs.
Dinara Mukh, a leading expert in women’s health, nutrition and hormone balance, identifies each of these stages as seasons within our bodies. Each season yields unique conditions which can be harnessed to help live in synchronicity with your cycle, rather than feeling like you have to fight against it.
Menstruation is where the menstrual cycle begins. The first day of menstruation is when you start your period, and the uterine lining begins to shed. Mukh identifies this as our “inner winter” – a time of renewal in which we should allow for rest and patience.
During this time fatigue is one of the most common period complaints. Sinking hormones are a big part of this, where prior to your period the hormones oestrogen and progesterone drop, while the decline in oestrogen often causes a dip in the mood and energy chemical: serotonin. This, coupled with the pain of cramps and a loss of iron from menstrual bleeding can leave menstruators feeling a little defeated. It’s important to be patient with yourself during this time, practicing some self care when you can, going on gentle walks, stretching, and giving yourself time to recover from the massive physical change that is the shedding of the uterine lining.
The follicular phase, which Mukh calls our “inner spring,” starts with the first day of menstruation and ends with the first day of ovulation.
During this time estradiol (the most potent type of oestrogen) begins to rise, with Dr. Taylor Hahn of HerMD stating “often, this is when you may feel the most energised, sociable, clear minded, and happy.” Mukh encourages brainstorming and initiating new projects in this time as menstruators may experience a surge of energy and enthusiasm. A study in Brain Sciences which found menstruators were more likely to feel positive emotions during the late follicular phase than emotions like anger supports this, highlighting this 10–14-day period as one in which we can expect to feel good, and excited to take on new challenges.
Ovulation, where an egg is released and the womb becomes most fertile, is our “inner summer” – a time in which increased confidence, happiness, and sexual desirability are often felt more acutely.
Dr. Hahn notes that testosterone rises around the ovulation phase, which is closely linked to improved mood and energy. Ovulation is a great time to express yourself, use your heightened confidence to achieve goals and connect with others, pitch more ideas, and honour your body and its strength as you approach the final phase of your cycle.
Finally, in the luteal phase, we enter into our “inner autumn.” After ovulation, the follicle left behind by the departing egg secretes progesterone, a hormone that readies the uterus to accept and maintain a fertilised egg.
Initial progesterone can improve sleep and lower anxiety. However, if an egg and sperm do not meet during this process progesterone levels take a sharp drop, which has been highlighted by some scientists as the cause of emotional changes commonly called premenstrual syndrome (PMS). While this time can be challenging, it offers heightened focus, time to notice details, and may lend itself well to completing tasks.
Everyone’s cycles are different, and everyone’s emotions are unique. When it comes to understanding yourself and your relationship with your menstrual cycle it might be helpful to keep a diary of how you feel at different times of your month, noticing trends that may allow you to prioritise tasks when you know you’ll be most affective, and especially allocate periods of rest when you think you might need them.
Importantly, while there may be times when those who menstruate are particularly adept at certain things, the reality is that menstruators are expected to deliver regardless of their menstrual cycle. Remaining mindful, noticing how others are feeling, and practicing patience with yourself and others remains a powerful mode of support and activism in a society that is not built for those with a monthly hormonal cycle.
If you are experiencing what feels like extreme and unmanageable emotions around your cycle, don’t hesitate to ask for advice from your GP.
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